In what is always a very sensitive and touchy topic in the realm if dating and relationships, married men have always attracted single women and vice versa.
To begin this column, I want to first disclose that as Founder, CEO and Publisher of this site, The Inscriber: Digital Magazine maintains the highest levels of class and professionalism in covering a range of issues, about entertainment, dating, culture, lifestyle and sports.
A recent column by our In-House Dating & Relationships Expert/Serial Monogamist, Ms. X titled, ‘The Pro’s Of Dating A Married Man” drew a lot of criticism and backlash for being “garbage” “trashy” and condoning adultery. For the record, while there are those that this column may have offended and proverbially ruffled the feathers of, the column is well within the rights of freedom of the press, freedom of expression and right of free speech.
Denying Ms. X the right to post and publish such a piece would have been direct censorship and denying her the same creative freedom that every other staff writer already has.
I just want to take a moment to express my personal and deepest regrets to anyone who was offended by the piece, but I will maintain that Ms. X had the right to post such a column, and that I will always allow true creative freedom as Senior Editor-In-Chief of this site.
As for the case of married men and single women, consider this my rebuttal on why taken men need to do a better job of resisting the allure of single women and not become the prey of such a extramarital home-wrecking predator. The sad and tragic part is that for married men, the allure and temptation of a hot and attractive single woman is everywhere, at work, on social media and even within your own circle of friends.
According to a 2009 Forbes article titled, “Just How Many Spouses Cheat?” written by Karyln Bowman, stated that Tom Smith, the director of the General Social Survey at the National Opinion Research Center (NORC) at the University of Chicago, that the number of affairs rises before eventually falling off, “the proportion of Americans the who have ever had an affair rises from 13% among 18- to 29-year-olds to 20% among those in the mid-life-crisis years, from ages 40 to 49.”
Based on the research above, one can come to the conclusion that there is a window of proverbial cheating for married men, but eventually closes. This is not a knock towards my fellow married brothers, but y’all need to do a better job of avoiding temptation in getting a wandering eye and wondering if the grass is greener on the other side. Because at the end of the day, it isn’t emotionally, psychologically and most of all financially.
While the thrill of the kill is the chase for some women, here are my three reasons why dating a taken man is nothing but endless drama, hassle and in the end, heartbreak.
1.) He Is Still Taken: Yes, Angelina Jolie swiped Brad Pitt from Jennifer Aniston and Miranda Lambert stole Blake Shelton from Kaynette Williams, that a single woman chose to prey on married men, speaks of a case of daddy issues, low self-esteem, a deeply buried psychological need for attention and a lack of morals over all. What kind of rush do these women get in taking a spoken-for man is a mystery, but in the end, he will not leave his wife for you.
2.) Post-Affair Baggage: A little something that aspiring mistresses tend to miss in the tiny fine print of pursuing a married man is that of the transition from “the other woman” “jumpoff/side piece” to “the girlfriend”. Gone is the excitement and thrill of sneaking around, leaving smoke signals in cyber-space and late-night sexting, and now is the time of deciding whether or not to make this an actual relationship, fling, or another simple sexual conquest. Also, you have to wonder in the back of your mind is whether or not he will commit to you—only to leave you for ANOTHER woman.
3.) The Missus ALWAYS Finds Out: For whatever rhyme or reason, a wife has a natural sixth sense, an uncanny instinct of her spouse straying. If there is a sudden increase of affection, an unexpected showering of gifts, it set’s of a wives radar fasting than a speeding bullet. Despite not being seen as being as tech-savvy as men, women morph into Mata Hari-like cyber-sleuths when they suspect something is up.
Your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Ashley Madison, Snapchat secret accounts, e-mail and text messages will all eventually be uncovered by a determined and vicious wife, who when she finds out who you are, you can bet that she will find out WHERE you are thanks to GPS tracking.
Couple that with today’s current culture of slut-shaming, which is being the equivalent of being hanged and flogged publicly, and your dirty laundry will be out there for ALL to see. While you may have covered your tracks well in sneaking around with her husband, a scorned wife is a ruthless assassin no mistress wants to face on her day of reckoning.
While being the mistress is fun, and you get to eat a couple of samples of your proverbial cake, but in the end, the wife will trump you.
Bottom line is that no taken man is worth all the never-ending, non-stop and VERY public spectacle that would become your life, which is why it may be better sticking to the single and shallow side of the proverbial dating pool, before daring to venture into the deeper waters of housewives.