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Care To Learn Male Masturbation Tricks? We’ll Keep It Secret


What up brave guy? I commend you for having the courage to look this article up. Some people should really learn from you and stop being a coward. It’s about time they man up! Not exactly sure how to jerk off? Don’t worry; your secret’s safe with us. After all, the first step to manhood is accepting your weaknesses. And if masturbation is yours, then there’s no shame in that. We’re here to help you enjoy that experience a little better.

Before we go on to give you tips and tricks on how you can enjoy the deed better however, we want you to know that masturbation isn’t for everyone. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with NOT wanting to masturbate. Maybe you just like the real action best? Just kidding. Anyway, there’s no reason to force yourself into doing something just because all the other bros think it’s cool. If you really do want to master it and experience exhilarating satisfaction from doing it, then call me Master Bate.

See what I did there?

Here are factors that I believe can affect the whole masturbation experience for you. Get them right and you’re sure to have a good time.

You Have To Make Sure That The Mood Is Right


Yes, this is the very first thing that you have to take care of. The mood is very important to the experience. If you want to have to get a taste of heaven for a few good minutes then you have to do it somewhere that is – well, “heavenly.” I’m not saying you should go look for paradise; your room will suffice as long as certain conditions are met.

The lighting for example, must be on point. I know this might come off as a bit of an overreaction but it’s true. When it’s too bright inside the room, it just doesn’t feel right you know. And when you’re young and experimenting, your mom can barge into the door at any second. With the lights bright enough to blind you, you bet she’ll caught you in the act. While it is normal for healthy teenage boys to have a little bit of fun sometimes (okay, maybe oftentimes), it’s still pretty messed up to have your mom see you live in action. It’s simply too awkward. Keep the lights dim now, okay? It’s for your sake and everybody else’s. It will also help set the mood right. You can do this by buying a nightlight or a nice lamp shade.

Find A Good “Sexpiration”

I know that you know what I’m talking about. Let’s not keep anymore secrets between us, capeesh? The whole idea of masturbation is to stimulate yourself without having a sexual partner. Of course, it’s hard to feel aroused when there’s nothing to arouse you right? Sure, some people can get by with just using their imagination but some of us just don’t have that same talent. We need to feel or at least see something to be stimulated. Jerking off by yourself already looks pretty sad. Jerking off to nothing looks even sadder. So I suggest you keep something that can help you during times like this.

It can be anything, really. It can be a sexy magazine or a pornographic video. If you’re lucky enough to have a girlfriend, then maybe you can even ask her to lend you an underwear or two – unwashed, preferably. On second thought, scratch that. It’s too weird. Not to mention, it’s a little disgusting. Let’s just stick to virtual stimulation, okay? Whether it’s a VS model or a Food Network anchor, it really depends on your preference. Just get one.

Check out more tips here: https://www.bustle.com/articles/97336-how-to-pleasure-yourself-better-because-you-deserve-the-best.

You Might Want To Get Rid Of Everything That Might Distract You

Lock the door, feed the dog, switch your phone to silent (or maybe just turn it off), and make sure nobody else is home. It can be a real bummer when someone disturbs you while you’re “busy.” Like, can’t they take a hint? Wait, no. People almost always don’t know how to take hints. So instead of counting on them to be sensitive about the situation, you should just make sure that all possible distractions are accounted for. Tell the crazy girlfriend that you’ll be cleaning your room for the next two hours. Turn off your computer. Keep your phone from ringing or vibrating at the wrong time and don’t forget to tell your mom that you’ll just come down with the laundry. For all you know, she’s got a spare key and will just suddenly barge into your turf uninvited. Anyway, take all the necessary precautions.

Adult Toys Can Give You A Whole New Experience

I’ll be making a rather extreme suggestion but I assure you, these things can be super fun. So, let’s be adults and talk about them seriously. Adult toys are what you’d term as “sex toys.” They’re basically made to amplify sexual stimulation and experience. There are toys you use with a partner. There are also toys you use for yourself. Either way, they all do the same thing. To put it bluntly, they can help you climax faster. And you know how it is with masturbation: The faster, the better. If you want to order one for yourself, click here.

Ever Heard About Lube?

Some dudes just go with lotion or whatever but the feel is better when you use a lubricant specifically formulated for intercourse. Trust me; if you lubricate, it feels almost the same as the real deal. It’s like you’ve got the big V in your palms. Just keep your eyes closed at all times when you’re doing it so that you won’t be reminded of the sad, sad state you’re in. That’s a joke right there. We’re cool, right?

You can buy lubricants for like a dollar at pharmacies and convenience stores. Don’t need to be too self-conscious about it. Just tell them your dad put you up to it, lol. Better yet, just slip it in with other items.

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