Extortion, blackmail, bribery, humiliation or things the vast majority of people would prefer to avoid, but nonetheless form the basis of one of the world’s fastest growing fetishes.
If you’re new to the whole Findom online thing, you’ll probably be wondering where on earth the appeal in all of the above lies.
A New Form of Desirable Degradation
It’s not as if degradation is anything new in the whole sexual psychology thing. Throughout history, the transference of power and acceptance of a submissive position have been enjoyed by millions in cultures all over the world.
What makes the difference with findom is the way in which the physical element is removed from the equation entirely. The parties involved never meet – findom is a form of erotic humiliation where the submissive relinquishes control of their finances.
Findom has actually been around for quite some time in the BDSM community, though has come into its own over recent years with the advent of both social media and instant digital payment systems. Both of which have made it easier to both set up as a financial dominatrix and to find such an individual to get your fix.
How Does Financial Domination Work?
The logistics of the findom industry (which is surprisingly large) are comprehensively simple. Relationships are established with dominatrix’s via social media sites, after which payments are demanded which the submissive must transfer on time or face the consequences.
In this instance, consequences could be anything from a verbal telling-off to additional penalty payments to threats of the submissive’s activities to date being publicized or posted on their wife’s social media page, if they fail to meet their obligations.
For some, the thrill lies in getting tied into an arrangement where regular payments (often moderate in size) must be paid on time without exception. By contrast, others genuinely seem to get a kick out of watching somebody deplete their entire bank account without their control.
All of which can again make it difficult to understand what those involved actually get out of the whole thing. Nevertheless, the psychology of financial domination is predominantly no different than that of other comparable fetishes of a more physical nature.
A Comparison with BDSM Culture
When you consider BDSM culture from a wider perspective, there is one thing that perpetuates in all instances irrespective of the type of BDSM in question:
There are some people – quite a lot of them in fact –who get a kick out of being told what to do.
Life is a constant battle against certainty and there are so many people who spend their days and nights questioning everything they think, everything they do and everything they fail to do. In such cases, there’s often something uniquely satisfying about the ‘release’ that comes with relinquishing control to someone else.
At the opposite end of the scale, you have those who are turned on in the most intense way by risk. It’s only when they feel there are major consequences on the line that they’re able to get the satisfaction they crave – sexual or otherwise.
These explain the basis of the psychology of BDSM in general, which in both instances apply just as much with financial domination and with any other form of domination. Submissiveness is addictive because of the way in which the thrill of letting go and relinquishing control is more or less preprogrammed into the very psyche of the human mind.
“In return for your devotion, I will relieve you from the burden of decision, using you as I see fit for my entertainment and the entertainment of my friends. I will decide what is best for you, what roles you should be trained in, when you require humbling and when you will be rewarded,” a quote from esteemed Goddess IshtarXXX, who knows the business better than most.
“As you serve, I will dig deeper and deeper into the darkest parts of your soul, discovering your most hidden desires and bringing them to the surface, becoming a true mirror to who you are, the only person in the world with whom you can be completely honest.”
Far from dirty, deranged or in any way dehumanising, the whole findom online thing is more about freedom. The freedom that comes with letting someone else make decisions on your behalf and putting you in a position of complete humbleness.
Something which for those involved understandably becomes addictive – perhaps even a long-term lifestyle choice.