Like death and taxes, menopause is inevitable for most women, and while it means a few changes, it doesn’t mean the end of your life and not your sex life.
Symptoms of menopause include night sweats, hot flashes, sleep problems, and irregular periods to name a few. While these cause discomfort, they don’t necessarily affect a menopausal woman’s sex life. However, the following do:
- Vaginal dryness
- Reduced libido
- Dyspareunia (pain during intercourse)
- Reduced skin sensitivity and arousal
That’s the bad news, and while you might be thinking it all sounds dreadful and that there couldn’t possibly be a light at the end of the tunnel, the good news is not all is lost, including your libido.
Menopause is a bit of a double-edged sword because while women are experiencing vaginal dryness, hot flashes, and a dwindling libido, they’re also at their sexiest. Their self-esteem, relationship skills, and communication style blossoms and they no longer have a need, or desire, to impress anyone anymore.
If you’re struggling with sex at the moment, there are ways to arouse yourself or your menopausal partner, including the use of lubrication, sex toys, and certain foods, as well as products that especially assist in this er, area.
Zestra is made by Sempra, a company founded by women who are dedicated to improving women’s sex lives. Because one of the symptoms of menopause is vaginal dryness and a decrease in skin sensitivity and arousal Zestra, an essential oil, assists in increasing the sensitivity of the labia and clitoris, which means an increase in arousal and pleasure during intercourse.
To use the product, simply rub it onto your labia and clitoris, or get your partner to do it as a part of foreplay. Almost immediately there is a warm and tingly feeling that peaks after about 10 minutes and last for 45 minutes.
It is recommended by doctors and sexual health care practitioners; it’s safe to ingest and is hypoallergenic. Most women who have used it report positive results with an increase in sexual desire, arousal, and satisfaction.
Pros and Cons or even the Ups and Downs
If you are thinking about using Zestra it’s important that you are aware of the pros and cons. If you’re still unsure, you can ask your GP or health practitioner. If you’re looking for other ways to arouse your partner read on to see what we recommend. You can use one or more of the suggestions depending on the mood you’re in.
- Use Lube
Not only for horny teens and singles, but lube can also make sex more pleasurable and add a new level of excitement as you experiment with different positions and techniques. You can use it for foreplay, during intercourse or for sensual massages. If you do experience vaginal dryness, you can apply it throughout the day, or you can make it a part of your night time routine. We suggest using a water-based lubricant.
- DIY
Masturbation has so many benefits: it relieves stress, improves the pelvic blood flow, helps with sleep and improves sexual response. While some people think masturbation detracts from a couple’s intimacy, it enhances it. There are studies that show people with partners masturbate more than singles.
- Experiment with Sex Toys
Buy yourself a sex toy, or even better, choose one with your partner. Studies show that women who use vibrators have higher levels of sexual health and functioning. This is because the vibrations help stimulate the pelvic blood flow, which increases sensitivity and facilitates sexual response and arousal.
- Sexy Foods
It might be an idea to look at your diet and make a few changes that’ll have a positive impact on your sexual health. How does food affect your vagina you ask? It doesn’t, but things like sleep (or lack thereof), energy levels, mood, stress regulation and libido are all connected to the types of food you eat. Try things like maca, blueberries, coconut, cacao, honey and ginseng to increase your sex drive.
- Stop Worrying About It
We know it’s easier said than done, but a surefire way to ruin your sex life is by worrying about it all the time, whether it’s the lack of sex, the frequency, or how much. Changes to your libido are normal, and while you might not find yourself being in the mood for intercourse as often as you used to, there are other ways to be intimate with your partner, like flirting, sexting and masturbating that will keep you connected.