In the world of child therapy, fostering a sense of safety, trust, and emotional connection is essential. For children who have experienced trauma, neglect, or attachment disruptions, building a strong therapeutic relationship can be challenging. Therapists often encounter children who struggle to trust adults or express their emotions in a healthy way. One of the most effective approaches in addressing these challenges is PACE (Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity, and Empathy), developed by clinical psychologist Dan Hughes. PACE is a relational and attachment-focused therapeutic model designed to create a deep connection between therapists and children. By integrating the principles of PACE into therapy, practitioners can significantly strengthen the therapeutic bond, laying the groundwork for healing and emotional growth.
What Is PACE Training?
Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity, and Empathy are what PACE stands for. All of these things are very important for making sure that kids feel understood, valued, and mentally safe in a therapeutic relationship. PACE makes the space safe and welcoming so kids can talk about their thoughts and feelings without fear of being judged or turned down.
PACE is not a technique that therapists apply occasionally but rather a way of being with the child. It embodies an attitude that therapists adopt throughout their interactions, enabling them to approach children with compassion, understanding, and openness. Compass Australia PACE training Australia equips therapists with the tools and mindset needed to effectively apply these principles, creating a more connected and attuned therapeutic relationship.
The Core Components of PACE
To understand how PACE strengthens therapeutic relationships, it’s important to explore the four key components:
1. Playfulness
Playfulness encourages lightness and fun in interactions, which helps children relax and feel comfortable. Many children, especially those who have faced trauma or neglect, may feel guarded or anxious in therapy sessions. Incorporating playful activities or humour can lower a child’s defences and build a sense of safety and connection.
By using playfulness, therapists can create a positive atmosphere that invites exploration of difficult emotions in a less intimidating way. It also allows children to express themselves creatively and experience joy, which can be a healing process in itself. Playfulness, however, must be applied sensitively, ensuring that it is appropriate for the child’s emotional state and readiness.
2. Acceptance
Acceptance involves fully embracing the child’s feelings, thoughts, and behaviours without judgment. Many children in therapy, especially those with attachment difficulties, may have experienced environments where their emotions or behaviours were criticised or rejected. As a result, they may develop defences to protect themselves from further emotional harm.
In PACE, therapists show children that they are accepted just as they are. This doesn’t mean condoning harmful behaviours but rather accepting the child’s internal world—recognising their emotions as valid and worthy of attention. This kind of support builds a strong sense of safety and trust, which makes the child more likely to be open and honest about how they feel.
3. Curiosity
Curiosity invites the therapist to approach the child’s experiences with a genuine desire to understand. Instead of making assumptions or jumping to conclusions about a child’s behaviours or emotions, therapists using PACE ask questions with curiosity, helping the child explore their own inner world.
This approach helps the child feel understood and valued, as they sense that the therapist is truly interested in their perspective. It also encourages children to reflect on their own feelings and behaviours in a non-threatening way, promoting self-awareness and emotional growth.
For example, instead of responding to a child’s outburst with frustration, a therapist might say, “I wonder if something happened earlier today that made you feel upset,” inviting the child to explore their emotions without feeling judged.
4. Empathy
Empathy is at the heart of PACE. It involves deeply understanding and sharing in the child’s emotional experience. When therapists respond with empathy, they communicate to the child that their feelings are important and valid. This shared emotional understanding fosters a strong bond of trust between the therapist and the child.
Empathy allows therapists to attune to the child’s emotional state and provide comfort during difficult moments. For children who have experienced trauma, the presence of an empathetic adult can be profoundly healing, as it offers them a sense of being seen and supported in their emotional journey.
How PACE Strengthens Therapeutic Relationships
1. Building Trust and Safety
For many children, particularly those with a history of trauma or disrupted attachments, trust is not easily given. These children may have learned that adults are unreliable or unsafe, leading them to build emotional walls. PACE training teaches therapists to create an environment where the child feels secure, valued, and emotionally safe.
By consistently showing playfulness, acceptance, curiosity, and empathy, therapists demonstrate to the child that they are not being judged or criticised. This helps to dismantle the child’s defences and opens the door for genuine connection and trust. Over time, as the child sees that the therapist is a stable and supportive presence, they begin to feel safer in expressing their emotions and engaging in the therapeutic process.
2. Enhancing Emotional Regulation
Many children who have experienced trauma or attachment disruptions struggle with emotional regulation. They may exhibit explosive behaviours, withdrawal, or extreme anxiety. PACE helps therapists create a space where the child can explore these overwhelming emotions without fear of rejection.
Through empathy and curiosity, therapists guide the child in understanding their emotional experiences and developing healthier ways to regulate them. As children begin to feel that their emotions are understood and accepted, they are better able to manage them. This emotional regulation further strengthens the therapeutic relationship, as the child feels more in control and support.
Conclusion
PACE training provides therapists with the tools and mindset to build strong, trusting, and compassionate relationships with children. By integrating playfulness, acceptance, curiosity, and empathy into their interactions, therapists create an environment where children feel safe, valued, and understood. This, in turn, strengthens the therapeutic relationship, fostering emotional healing and helping children navigate the challenges of their inner world.