Last week there was a link being shared on Facebook with the title of Why My Kids Are Not The Center Of My World and it certainly is an attention grabbing headline. The young mother did make some interesting points unfortunately for the most part it got filled with gross over generalizations and flawed logic.
While it’s true certain games on the playground are no longer acceptable children are able to adapt to new games to play while at school. So how is that really a big deal or is she just using a stereotype to prove a point? Do all young boys really want to play or at least pretend to play with guns? What about young girls? Should those be playing with dolls or playing house?
Her next point comes in regards to bullying and which she believes at one point it got defined by being slammed into a locker or having lunch money being taken. Then goes on to state “there was a time when kids got called names and got picked on, and they brushed it off and worked through it.”
Sure some did and were able to make it through the day. The main reason to survive, tattling draws more attention to their plight and in some situations who knows of the teacher is even going to act on it if there are no witnesses.
Shane Koyczan has a spoken word poem titled “To This Day” and he wrote it “to further explore the profound and lasting impact that bullying can have on an individual.”
Here’s an excerpt from the poem itself.
“She was eight years old
our first day of grade three
when she got called ugly
we both got moved to the back of the class
so we would stop get bombarded by spit balls
but the school halls were a battleground
where we found ourselves outnumbered day after wretched day
we used to stay inside for recess
because outside was worse
outside we’d have to rehearse running away
or learn to stay still like statues giving no clues that we were there
in grade five they taped a sign to her desk
that read beware of dog”
That is not something that is easily brushed off or even persevere through it’s something that sticks with the person long after childhood ends. Meaning that her rationale about modern parenting is absurd when she states “the young generations of today (yes, I sound old. I realize I’m only 29 years old.) are being taught that they shouldn’t have to ever put up with anything doesn’t make their hearts feel like rainbow colored unicorns are running around pooping skittles onto piles of marshmallows.”
Honestly can’t tell if this young woman has spent anytime in the real world herself. Teaching children to respect others will not have the dire consequences she points out. Now are there parents who are too involved with their children? Of course. Yet, many parents who are willing to let their children take risks, make mistakes and that it’s okay to fail every once in a while.
Going further some families have a parent or both parents work multiple jobs to put food on the table and do not have the ability to spend time with their children.
At this time cannot make any claims that modern parents aren’t letting their children make mistakes, fail or in her words “shouldn’t ever have to put up with anything.” It’s too complicated of an issue to place any kind of blame.
(I posted this on the Free Thought Project page, but wasn’t sure if you would see it there) I enjoyed your response. I really dislike the current attitudes about bullying in school. First of all, I am NOT a “helicopter parent” and I expect my kids to work things out for themselves and experience natural consequences as much as possible. HOWEVER, as parents we need to do our best to 1) “bully-proof” our kids and 2) help them develop the courage to stand up for those being bullied. I doubt any adult would tolerate walking down an alley and being shoved up against a wall and robbed, and I’m pretty sure if someone calls a coworker a bit*h at work, HR is going to be getting involved, but somehow expecting our kids to tolerate it in school because it’s “good for them” “makes them tough” and “builds character” and “prepares them for the real world” is ridiculous. If your “real world” involves battery and theft, you really need to move.
I Really appreciate the comment. Truly don’t know what reality this young mother is living in and while she did have a point, she failed to make it, which is why I wrote this as a response.