Conflicting values and infidelity are some of the challenges you might encounter in marriage. When you find yourself struggling to resolve such issues, a couples therapist can help you improve your relationship. A therapist creates a safe space for you and your partner to share your emotions. The following are some approaches to couples therapy:
Gottman Method Therapy
Dr. John Gottman developed this method based on his research on couples’ communication patterns. You can adopt this method in your relationship by creating a shared vision to aid in strengthening your bond. Developing your partner’s admiration is one aspect of this approach. A therapist can help you to identify the positive qualities in your partner that you might have overlooked.
You also learn not to blame your partner and instead take responsibility for your actions. When you resolve conflicts, you can accept your differences and avoid getting into repetitive arguments. Gottman’s method encourages communication as a tool for enhancing intimacy in a relationship.
Emotionally Focused Therapy
Your source of disconnection with your partner could stem from failure to communicate your emotions. You may find yourself wishing your partner could read your mind or vice versa. Emotionally focused couples therapy can help you break this barrier by holding a non-judgmental conversation. You learn to open up about your anxieties, challenges, and concerns without fear of rejection. A couple therapist assists you in discovering how to become more responsive to your partner’s needs.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
In your relationship, you might perceive things differently from your partner. You may also interpret your partner’s behavior in a way that causes conflicts. These thought patterns tend to disrupt your relationship. Your partner may not be able to fully understand your perspective, and this could lead to further misunderstandings.
Cognitive behavioral couples therapy focuses on addressing these thought patterns. It addresses how your thoughts affect your emotions and behavior. You learn how to identify and challenge negative thoughts and replace them with more positive ones. Your partner also learns how to communicate with you in a way that promotes understanding and reduces conflicts.
How To Find the Right Therapy Fit
Being clear on your specific needs can help you find solutions to your challenges. Some therapists specialize in certain types of therapy, while others have a more general approach. The following are ways to determine if a couples therapist is the right fit for you:
Understand Your Objectives
When finding the right couples therapist, understand what your objectives are. List what is making your relationship challenging and what you need to achieve, whether that is better communication or increased intimacy. Knowing your objectives allows you to articulate your needs to a therapist.
Talk With Your Partner
Your partner’s input is valuable when seeking a couples therapist. Discuss your challenges together and ask for their opinion on the type of therapy they are most comfortable with. You can also talk about what has been working in your relationship and what hasn’t. This will give you a better idea of what you both need from therapy.
Be Open to Adjustments
The initial sessions with a couple therapist are usually about understanding your relationship dynamics. Your therapist may make suggestions that might be new to you. When you become open to these adjustments, you can explore new ways of thinking and behaving in your relationship. This means letting go of old habits that may be causing conflicts in your relationship and being willing to try new solutions.
Find a Qualified Couples Therapist Today
Couples therapists provide differing solutions depending on their area of expertise and your needs. Instead of allowing your relationship to slowly deteriorate, visit a couple therapist as soon as you notice problems. Contact a reputable therapist and schedule an appointment today.