If you’re a parent, then you know that one of the most frustrating situations is realizing that your child is not listening.
What’s more annoying is when you request him or her to complete a specific task only to discover that the chore was not done. In most cases, he or she will tell you, “Sorry, I didn’t quite hear that!”
When your child doesn’t listen, you feel like losing your mind. While it’s normal for children to be argumentative and non-compliant at times, failure to address this often leads to disrespectful behaviors in the long term. Of course, talking to your kids is not always easy, and once they ignore you, it’s hard to fight that feeling of frustration.
Fortunately, we’re here to tell you that you don’t have to go through such stress anymore. We’ll share five compelling methods of finally capturing your child’s attention. They might be what you desperately need!
1. Ask Your Child to Repeat Anything They Hear: Here is a tip we are all familiar with as a good number of our parents used it on us. So, once you issue an instruction to your kid, ask him or her to repeat everything you’ve said. We’ve discovered that this is a valid method of ensuring that your child understands what you expect. In any case, it also acts as an excellent opportunity for clarification, especially if there’s a misunderstanding.
2. Try Connecting Before You Talk: Don’t start speaking until you’re sure you have your kid’s attention. This means that you shouldn’t go yelling orders if you’re in another room. If you do so, then we guarantee you that your son or daughter will neither listen nor respond.
Instead, get close to your child, humble yourself and give him or her a gentle touch. The next step is to observe what he or she is doing and maybe make a positive comment about it. For instance, you could say, “I loved reading your paper, are you one of the essay writers in your class?”
Once he or she looks up, you can start talking. However, if this does not happen, grab his or her attention by maybe asking, “Hey, I have something to tell you.” Keep in mind that even the slightest wordings can quickly boost your chances of getting your child to comply.
3. Take Care of Your Tone: We know that controlling your tone is one of the hardest tasks of any parent. However, we’re here to tell you that even if you’re frustrated and tired, never screech or bark out requests at your child. Instead, always try using a positive and upbeat tone.
On the other hand, when showing limits, ensure that you sound confident. If you’re uncertain, your child is more likely to ignore or defy your order. To show disapproval, use a lower, firmer, and more authoritative tone but avoid shouting. For example, if you’re having trouble trying to convince him or her to do homework, you could say, “Hey, finish your assignment and I’ll allow you toeat some cake before you sleep.”
All in all, don’t be a nagging parent. It’s better to ask once firmly and nicely before taking action. If you usually repeat yourself before taking the initiative, your kid will start ignoring all your initial requests. Besides, such a pattern may even go deep into his or her teen years. So, it’s wise to establish a strong foundation as early as you can!
4. Carefully Choose the Right Words: You weaken your message and lose your kid’s attention when you talk too much. A suitable example is when issuing instructions. Here, to get straight to the point, use a few words, explicit commands, and brief requests.
Let’s take a situation where you’re trying to convince your son to brush his teeth before going to bed. Don’t give him a full-paragraph of details on why it’s crucial for him to brush his teeth, instead, try keeping it simple. You could say, “Josh, you only have ten minutes to brush your teeth.”
It’s also essential to point out that you should avoid any form of criticism while issuing your request. So don’t say something like this, “Max, you’re always on Instagram when you should be brushing your teeth!” Most importantly, never threaten your child no matter the situation. Remember that remaining calm even in the most terrible cases is what defines a caring parent.
5. Reinforcing Positive Behavior: It’s essential that, as a parent, you praise your kids once they follow your instructions correctly. You’ll realize that this is an excellent method of improving your child’s habits. Saying something like, “good job putting your laundry in the washing machine when I told you to,” encourages him or her to do it again when you ask.
Another method of fostering good behavior is by issuing rewards. If your kid has done a fantastic job after listening to you, give him or her something special to remember. So, if you tell your daughter to clean up her room and she does it correctly, take her to the mall and get her some ice cream and maybe a beautiful dress.
Furthermore, if your teenage daughter does well in her exams, ensure that you’ve given her a gift that she’ll always remember. This is quite essential as it will teach her to treasure those long hours that she took to read while fighting off the distractions that come with adolescence. Well, it might be something small or huge, but the main aim is to encourage and motivate her to keep following the same direction.
Conclusion: Research shows that over the last 50 years, the average mother has less than 2.5 kids. These results only show that parenting is not an easy process. Luckily, with these methods, you can finally have a reasonable and thoughtful child who shares a deep connection with you.
However, despite all these factors, as a parent, how have you managed to get your child to listen to you?
Author’s Bio: Charles Ebert is a career mentor, motivational speaker & human resources consultant with over 10 years of experience in HR sector. Apart from career mentoring, he loves photography and football. Find him on Linkedin, Twitter, Facebook & Google+.