When it comes to abusive relationships, many people think it only applies to physical abuse. Many people also make the mistake of thinking abusive relationships only happens to straight couples. When it comes to toxic relationships, abuse can go beyond physical or even sexual orientation. In both straight and gay dating, emotional manipulation can be a reality and it can happen to you.
The most crucial step is to know how to identify the signs so you can act quickly. If you are suspicious of your partner or someone else’s partner, here are some behaviors that show signs of a toxic relationship.
1. They can do things you can’t.
One aspect of an abusive relationship is having a partner prohibit you from doing things that they allow themselves to do. For example, let’s say you have a partner that doesn’t like you going out to parties and drinking. So, when you do so, they get angry and punish you by ignoring your calls/text or withhold their affection. They make it very clear they won’t interact with you, or they threaten you with a break up unless you apologize and promise never to go out again.
Yet, while you have to stay home, your partner is completely fine with going out to parties and drinking themselves. Having a relationship where you have to restrict your behavior but your partner doesn’t is a warning that this is not healthy. Your partner should have enough trust in you to allow you to make your own decisions. If they don’t, then they will try to control your behavior.
2. They don’t respect your privacy.
Nobody likes to feel their privacy has been violated. Do you notice or suspect your partner goes through your things? Whether you know it or not, they might go through your cell phone, computer, or social media accounts. Even if they don’t go behind your back, they might still Or constantly demand to know the login and passwords to your devices and social media.
If he or she snoops through your things yet objects to you even looking at his or her cell phone or computer, this is a bad sign. This behavior shows your partner has no respect for your privacy. Trust is a big component of dating and a partner that constantly goes through your things is showing they don’t trust you. This kind of behavior is toxic in a relationship and can cause mistrust. Any partner that doesn’t trust you, especially when it is unwarranted, shouldn’t be in your life.
3. They always need to know where you are.
It’s normal for your partner to wonder where you are and ask what you’re doing every once in a while, but having a partner that needs constant updates on your movement around town isn’t normal. It is toxic behavior when a partner has to know exactly where you are and gets angry when you forget to do so. A partner that does this constantly is showing they have a need to control you.
This is especially true when it is only you that has to report to your partner. If your significant other is allowed to go through their day without letting you know where they are, then there is a toxic double standard being set. This level of controlling can escalate quickly, and you don’t want to find yourself in a dangerous situation.
4. You have to watch what you say.
Talking to the person you love shouldn’t be a hassle. If you have to constantly watch or monitor what you say around your partner out of fear of angering them, then you aren’t in a healthy relationship. Having a partner constantly getting mad and scolding you for the things you say is a big sign of toxic behavior. Having your partner control what you say and berate you for innocent comments is an attempt at control.
You should feel free to speak to one another without fear of repercussion. Communication is important in any relationship, so when your partner makes it hard for you to do so then it’s time to end it. Walking on eggshells around your partner is something that will build a long-term relationship.
5. Your partner is always jealous.
Do you notice that your partner is always suspicious of your motives? Perhaps you want to hang out with a friend or acquaintance and suddenly your partner starts accusing you of cheating or liking someone else. Or maybe they believe someone you know likes you and demand you refrain from interacting with them. Having a partner that’s always jealous is a huge sign that you’re in a toxic relationship.
It’s not normal to sacrifice friends for your partner, and it’s especially not normal for your partner to decide who you can spend time with. If you find your friend group slimming down, and your partner is the reason for it, then it is possible that they’re trying to isolate you. By doing this, your partner will have more control over your actions and won’t have to worry about anyone trying to alert you to their behavior.
If your partner displays even just one of these behaviors, you are more than likely in a toxic behavior. Just because they don’t act out physically against you doesn’t mean there isn’t abuse. Emotional manipulation can be just as toxic as anything physical, and avoiding relationships like these will allow for you to have normal, healthy relationships.