February 14.
It is the ONE day that most men either love or hate, dread or look forward to in an effort to up their dating game. Next to the Super Bowl, NFL Draft and your fantasy football league’s draft day, this is the one day that you as a man—single or married—have circled on your calendar.
If you are single, THIS is the one day that you ghost all of social media. I mean seriously seeing images of your ex and her new bae—boo, bae or mancessory—loving it up on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter will literally drive you into a proverbial meltdown.
Ironically, it is EVEN worse when you are in a committed relationship or are married. Why? Do you ask?
Because as Kevin Hart once said in one of his hilarious comedy skit, I’m A Grown Little Man stated, is because you are competing with other couples to show how much you love your partner—or sig—across social media. I call this “peacocking”.
Named after the bird itself, I use it to describe a couple that posts happy pictures of themselves, in a effort to make themselves appear happier—or more in love—than they really are.
And nothing, not one day is peacocking more obnoxious or nauseating than V-Day.
You know those couples that post ALL THE TIME about #relationshipgoals, how much they love each other, how great things are, where they went, all of those pictures too! You know who you are. We get it!
On behalf of all single and daters everywhere! Stop it! We don’t care about YOUR relationship, because the only reason you’re putting your stuff out there is to hide all of the bad and negatives in yours, thus the need to put up a false façade of how “great” things are.
We don’t care what restaurant you ate at, what you did at XYZ, but seriously, its bad enough when you are single, but it’s borderline tone-deaf on V-Day, as it is the equivalent of rubbing raw sandpaper over a paper cut.
When you’re single, separated or going through a divorce, V-Day might as well be the equivalent of Friday The 13th, in terms of being a never-ending nightmare of not being with “the one”, dating that special someone or even being out on the market. Imagine seeing posts of your ex with her new flame, while you’re still searching, or even worse…announcing her engagement on IG KNOWING that you are likely following online.
THAT is Chinese water torture on steroids.
I have my own personal reasons for despising and loathing this Hallmark-sponsored, corporately manufactured holiday that force-feeds you love and romance from all angles, all day every day,but all is not lost.
You have something to offer, you have that spark you could bring to whichever lucky lady happens to see it’s flame. As a man, you can be someone’s Mr. Right. As much as V-Day is a face, it is also one of the BEST days to meet, talk to and hookup with women if you play your cards right.
Whether it is a coffee shop, church, a dance club, sports bar or restaurant, doesn’t it always seem that you seem to find a woman when you LEAST expect it. Yes, there are the usual suspects such as Tinder, Plenty of Fish, OKCupid or whatever the hottest online dating app is at the moment, but when you least expect to her, is when you often find “the one”
Men and women—like the great rom-com movie, Serendipity starring John Cusack, Kate Beckinsdale—and pre Ari Gold—in Jeremy Piven—are connected and looking for their soulmates and go on their own personal journey to find each other. We sift thru the flakes, jerks, users, abusers and bad boys in the hopes of finding our equal and perfect mate.
And like Shawn Colvin’s song from that gem of a movie, When You Know, when you know that you know who you love, you can’t deny it.
Valentine’s Day…both a bane and a blessing for every man hoping to find love. Know your worth, know what you can bring to a woman’s life, show her why you’re worth it and let the chips fall where they may.
Love is a battlefield and relationships are a gamble, you just have to be comfortable with going all in.
Dating or causally smashing, married or platonic, here are the top three ways to seal the deal on V-Day
Brush Up on Your Nicolas Sparks! If you are a man, you’d most likely think that Nicolas Sparks is some dude from your bro’s bachelor party, who helped set up party favors or such. Unfortunately, your sig thinks he is the second coming of Ernest Hemmingway.
The 52-year-old Omaha,Nebraska-born romance novelist and author of nineteen novels and the man behind rom-com sob fests such as The Notebook, A Walk To Remember, Message In A Bottle, Dear John, The Last Song, The Lucky One and most recently The Longest Ride, if you hope to score on V-Day, be sure to have these flicks queued upon your DVR.
Know Your Lingerie! Guys, repeat after me…lingerie is sexy, lingerie is sexy, LINGERIE. IS. SEXY. If there is one day that it is PERFECTLY acceptable for a red-blood straight heterosexual male to causally wander into the likes of a Victoria’s Secret, peruse the likes of Yandy.com, Adore Me or Frederick’s of Hollywood, it is V-Day.
If you hope to see that hottie you pulled off of Tinder or Instagram in that two-piece black lingerie set,that you’ve been secretly fantasizing seeing her in—and out of—then you’d better secretly have her measurements down playa!
Order Those Roses! Last but certainly not least, aside from putting a IG-worthy, arthritis-inducing rock on her finger, that could be mistaken as either an African blood diamond or the second coming of the Hope Diamond, sending her a bouquet of roses is the best way to her heart—and panties—during V-Day.
Diamonds may be a girl’s best friend,but the perfect set of roses is a notable sidekick.