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INSCMagazine: Get Social!

Does it seem like women never return your messages on online dating sites? Here is the truth about why this is happening and what you can do about it to get better results (Hint: it’s not your fault!)

So, maybe you’ve joined one of those online dating sites to meet a few women. I’ve been there myself.

But there’s something that not many guys realize when they sign up for these sites.
The women on these sites are absolutely inundated with messages from men.

If you’ve sent out a few emails to that cute babe with the brown hair, chances are good there are tons of other guys doing the same.
To be blunt, she’s getting so many messages that your’s doesn’t even stand out. It’s not that she’s rejecting you. In most cases, she isn’t even reading your message.

So, if the deck is stacked against you, what are you to do? Does it mean you need to give up this whole online dating plan?

Not by a long shot!

You see, although she may be getting tons of messages from guys, most of them are flat-out boring.  They have subject lines like “hey” or “hello.” If you were getting 10, 20, or more messages per day, would you be more inclined to open one of those messages?

Probably not.

Take some time to think up a clever subject line. (Hint: make it show that you actually read her profile). To stand out from the pack you need to differentiation yourself.

Secondly, though, when she actually does open the email, she usually finds one of two things.

1 – Some canned message that a guy blasted out to hundreds (or thousands) of women in the desperate hopes that one of them will actually respond. Does this feel like romance?

No, it doesn’t, and that’s why this tactic doesn’t work. Again, try to find something unique about her profile and send her a short message to simply spark the conversation.

2 – She might also find a long and boring life story about who you are and how you spent every waking moment of your life since you were old enough to walk. This sin’t going to get a positive response from her either.

Why? Because this is too much information too soon. You haven’t even met her yet. She doesn’t need to know that you wet the bed until you were twelve or that you have a rash where the sun doesn’t shine.

Keep the first few messages light and short. Give the impression of being a fun and sociable guy at a party who makes small talk with the people he runs across.

After you get those first few messages out of the way, and she seems to actually be interested in you, should you start to get into more serious topics (though I’d recommend doing those in-person on an actual date).

So, remember to make your messages unique, personal, and short in the beginning. This will dramatically change your results with online dating.

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