As a 31-year-old woman raising a six-year-old daughter, I never thought I’d have the time to date nor did I really consider it. This belief has changed recently.
Dating without a child in the picture is hard enough. When that gets thrown into the mix and advice the guy that “I have one child” it’s likely that person won’t want a serious relationship and will cut off all communication.
Obviously dating a single mom is different than dating a single woman who either don’t have children or don’t have them living at home.
A single moms time will have its limits balancing it with work, taking care of her child and possibility spending time with friends and if she’s lucky enough a romantic partner.
My own experience has taught me that men don’t care for “kid baggage” and if I do get someone past the first date, he’s impatient, gets mad that I can’t give him my full attention or in some cases wants to meet my daughter right away.
These are some things that I’ve come up with to have a successful relationship while with a single mother.
Her kid is her No.1, no questions asked
There’s no way to have a spontaneous date at a moments notice, need time to find a babysitter and plan out what’s going to happen.
Depending on the relationship, the child’s father will be involved in her life. There is a reason they’re not together anymore. Stop being jealous.
Be considerate of our time. We work, have a social life, have families, athletic practices and games, ballet recitals, music lessons, and maybe we get to squeeze in some time for ourselves.
Be flexible. If the only time we get to see each other would be at my kids basketball game, come watch. That means a lot to us to have you engaged in our child’s life.
Expect to have “the talk” about being in a long-term relationship early on. She doesn’t want men passing through her or her kids life constantly. If you’re not in it for the long run, you’re not in it at all.
The kids might not like you at the start. Get over it and don’t take it personally. They’re going to be jealous that mom’s attention is going elsewhere. They will eventually get over it.
Above anything else, don’t ask to meet her kid early on. She want’s to make sure that you’re trustworthy, and good enough for her kids. I personally have a three-month rule.
Single mothers are among the most mature, responsible, and loving people on the planet. Their usually juggling something and in some cases are looking for someone to love them too as well as developing friendships with others. So, go in open-minded and more importantly keep and open mind, be understanding and sincere.
There’s an interesting stat that shows that single mothers are 50 percent less likely to cheat on their partners than a woman without children. Just like you we crave a stable relationship, open communication and someone who won’t runaway and is understanding that they’re no.2.