All relationships will take some work if you want them to last. However, kids can make it seem even more challenging to keep your relationship romantic. Here are a few ways you can overcome this challenge and find ways to keep your romance alive.
Work on Your Emotional Connection
You should make each other feel emotionally fulfilled and loved. The key to that is that you both feel loved. When you feel loved, you know that you are accepted and that your partner understands you. Sometimes, kids can make it feel more like a coexistence where you forget each other to the point that your relationship dies. To fix this, be sure that you continuously strive to improve your emotional connection.
You guys are going to wind up disagreeing about something, especially when you are tired and frustrated. However, as you learned in the Dating Matters program, you need to embrace these disagreements. Just be sure to be respectful of your partner so that you guys can find a resolution to these disagreements without ruining your relationship.
Keep Outside Relationships and Hobbies Alive
Despite what you’ve read in books or seen in movies, your partner is not the only person who is going to get you through the child-rearing stage with your sanity intact. In fact, relying too much on them will end up hurting your romance. You need to ensure that you both maintain your friendships, family ties, and separate hobbies, despite the challenges of children.
Communicate Openly and Honestly
Everyone knows that communication is the key to a healthy relationship. When you add kids to the mix, it becomes increasingly important that you communicate openly and honestly with your partner if you want to keep your romance alive.
Spend Regular Quality Time With Each Other
The experts recommend that you set aside regular periods of time where you guys can focus on each other. This will help keep you closer and avoid situations where you are so frustrated you end up in a violent situation.
Find a Shared Hobby
While everything may seem hectic, you guys need to hire a babysitter and take time to find a shared hobby. Whether it is dancing, walking, or cooking, this will give you some time together that can help you keep the romance alive.
Take Exciting Classes Together
Another great way to keep your relationship interesting is to take exciting classes and try new things with your partner. Whether you try a new restaurant or spend a day adventuring, this can be a great way to rekindle the flame after having kids.
Have Fun Together
When you first started dating, you guys probably had a lot of fun together. However, as kids get in the way, the fun can start to wane. If you want your relationship to survive, you will need to find a sense of humor. Keep playing, having fun, and surprising your partner to increase the romance in your relationship. You can even get the kids involved in this one, and all spend a day just playing.
Tell Your Partner What You Need
If you’re more worried about what the kiddos need, it can be hard to talk about what you need. In fact, you guys might even feel like you barely get time to think about what you need. If you do get the time to think about it, you probably don’t have the time to talk about it. Maybe discuss ways to spice up the bedroom and look to an adult toy shop for new ways to get the romance flowing.
Despite this challenge, you need to think about your needs. Then, you need to seek comfort and understanding from your partner. Your partner will probably sense if you need something but may be too distracted by the kids to figure out what it is. However, they are not a mind reader. Therefore, if you want the relationship to survive, you need to tell them your needs. No matter how long you guys have been together, it is still wise to tell them what you need. Be direct as possible when you do this.
While every relationship is unique, chances are you want yours to survive having children. Fortunately, you can do plenty of things to keep the romance alive and ensure that your relationship stays intact. Following these tips will get you off to a good start.