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Entertainment: Movie Review *Red Band Style* – Deadpool Is Dead Solid Perfect!

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🎶I don’t want anybody else, ’cause when I think of Deadpool, I touch myself, I touch my… 🎶 Oh, hello there. I hope you’ll excuse me, I’m still kinda giddy from watching what I hope will be the first of MANY Deadpool films. Why so “giddy” you may ask, because the “Merc with a Mouth” finally got the cinematic treatment he richly deserved.  It’s as if the bosses at Fox got together with Ryan Reynolds, director Tim Miller, and writers Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick, to collectively present Deadpool fans and moviegoers with a cinematic apology (for that weak ass buster version of Deadpool at the end of X-Men Origins: Wolverine) and Valentines gift all in one.

Alright, alright…I can see by that look on your face you want me to get to the review already! OK then, I fucking (yes I just used the “F-word”, it said Red Band in the title…duh!) loved this cinematic representation of Deadpool. The movie is slick, sexy, action packed, bloody, often vulgar, and hilarious. And that is exactly how it was ALWAYS meant to be. It’s raucous, unwholesome fun for the WHOLE family…provided, of course, everyone in the family is 17 years old or older.

It all starts with our hero (or anti-hero if his actions shake your concept, of what makes a hero, to its very core) Mr. Pool sitting on an overpass guard rail drawing a pretty picture. With a warm welcome, said hero paints us another picture, so to speak, that tells us just how he got to be sitting in that spot at that particular moment in time.

Once there was a fella named Wade, and he was a merc or mercenary for those not in “the know”. Well, it seems Wade wanted more outta life than hurting or killing people for money (eh…I guess some people are like that)  and saw an opportunity when he met and fell in love Vanessa. He couldn’t imagine a life without her until he found out he had cancer of the…well, everything. Just when shit was looking completely hopeless, some shady dude (of course, these bastards are always shady) offers him a way to beat his ailment. Why does this bring the story of Faust to mind? Don’t tell me you aren’t familiar with Faust, the damned story (no pun intended) has been around since the late 1500’s.

Anyway…where was I? Oh yeah, miracle cure for Wade. So the shady guy arranges for Wade’s treatment and wouldn’t you know it…Wade gets screwed over. Miracle cure nothin’… more like let’s torture Wade until he mutates and then we’ll make him a mindless slave. Yeah, I know…it sound’s like a shit deal to me too. So this Borax guy…no wait, his name was Ajax. I knew it was one of those cleaners. OK…so Ajax continues to like a bratty kid with a pair of tweezers tearing the wings and legs off of random insects and then, eureka…the torture induced  mutation occurs. Unfortunately poor Wade is disfigured and looks kinda like what I think would be the end result if a Rabbi pan-fried a piece foreskin after a circumcision. Yeah, I know…ugh!

So, Wade + almost incessant torture + newly developed mutation =  pissed off, pepperoni pizza complected, bad-ass mercenary, with regeneration ability, hellbent on vengeance. Did I mention he was pissed off? There is a bright side though…kinda.  Palmolive…er uh, Francis…no, I mean Ajax, yeah that’s it…Ajax claims he can reverse said damage, but then there’s this fire and Ajax vamooses, and now Wade is stuck looking pretty ragged and desperately needing to find his tormentor. Even though this potty mouthed merc with regenerating ability thinks he has nothing to lose in his pursuit of vengeance, he may find he is risking the loss of what matters most to him.

Oh shit, I almost forgot… even though I shouldn’t really have to say this to any of you at this point, stick around until the end of the credits.

Reese and Wernick penned a fantastic script, which ended up being an origin story, love story, and revenge film all wrapped up in one. Hopefully this duo will be involved in future film installments of Mr. Pool’s story, because frankly their treatment of the source material was exactly what was needed for this movie. It would also be very welcome if they continued to take jabs at and make references about the X-Men and the past cinematic incarnation of Deadpool, as well as throwing in the occasional bouts of self-deprecation. Oh, and you guys…REESE, WERNICK…I’M TALKIN’ TO YOU CHUCKLEHEADS! Please make sure the script ensures it gets a hard R rating next time as well, OK?

Nobody other than (Tim) Miller could have directed this movie. He proved this with the infamous leaked footage, which he created at Blur Studios. Regardless of his prowess for creating incredible action sequences, he was able to command hilarious and also very human performances from his cast. Going forward, Miller needs to be at the helm for additional movies in the series, or at the very least he should have final approval for whoever takes his place.

Reynolds as Wade Wilson aka Deadpool…I’m at a loss for words. Ever since his first portrayal of Wade Wilson, in that unfortunate origins movie of a certain X-Men member, it just made sense that he was the ONLY actor who should ever squeeze his sweet ass into any set of red tights belonging to the Merc with a Mouth. His comedic timing and style of delivery coupled with his physicality made him the obvious choice.

As the two other important people in Wade’s/Deadpool’s life, Morena Baccarin as Vanessa and TJ Miller as Weasel shared a great chemistry with Reynolds.  Baccarin and Reynolds truly added an element of romance to the movie, which at times was silly, bizarre, and even at times perverse, but still sweet overall. Reynolds and (TJ) Miller kind of play off of each other like a raunchy version of The Odd Couple (Lemon and Matthau not that newer wannabe shit). There’s gotta be an outtake reel somewhere of these guys losing their shit while trying to keep a straight face, and I need to see it. Everyone should have a Weasel in their life…take that any way you like.

Ed Skrein played the role of Ajax/Francis with steely and wonderfully malicious sort of demeanor. Pleasure in other people’s pain is his favorite dish on the menu and boy does he love to indulge. Of course a handsome villain with a British accent tends to seem more ominous or evil somehow.

The rest of the supporting cast was rounded out by, Gina Corano as Angel Dust, Brianna Hildebrand as Negasonic Teenage Warhead, Karan Soni as Dopinder, Leslie Uggams as Blind Al, Stefan Kapicic as the voice of Colossus, and Jed Rees as The Recruiter, all of whom gave great performances. And if it was as much fun to work on this film, as I imagine it was, it’s no mystery as to why it was so easy for the cast to offer up such great character portrayals. 

Of course there is also the soundtrack, which in itself is another great element of the movie.  I would have to say this soundtrack, while not necessarily better than Guardians of the Galaxy: Awesome Mix Vol. 1,  this soundtrack similarly offers up a myriad of popular songs that add a lot of character to the scenes in which they’re utilized.

So you, yeah you…the pretty lady with that rat faced dude, go see Deadpool. And you the “Ultimo Fanboy” wearing a vintage Deadpool t-shirt that is two sizes too small for you at this point, thus making you look like you’re stuffed into a sausage casing even though you don’t care ’cause you’re “keepin’ it real”, I already know you’re gonna see it if you haven’t already. You over there…YEAH YOU, the hipsters staring down at your phones…HEY, I KNOW YOU ALL CAN HEAR ME…you should…eh…fuck it, yeah you should go see it too. And those of you fans who love Ryan Reynolds but have no frame of reference where this particular comic book character is concerned, go see it anyways…you’ll probably still love it. Step lively one and all, and go see Deadpool…just as long as you’re of appropriate age to actually see it. If not bugger off and wait ’til you’re old enough or can sneak a peek on cable, DVD, on-demand, or what have you…when it’s available of course.

P.S. To all you parents who petitioned the filmmakers to make it a PG-13 film…it managed to bring in almost $150 million domestic gross at the box office this weekend (that’s a hefty record for R rated movies, just so you know) and nearly $260 million worldwide, so it looks like they didn’t need you to drag your under aged ankle biters to the movie for it to make bank. HA!

#DEADPOOL #MercWithAMouth

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Robert D. Cobb
Founder, Publisher and CEO of INSCMagazine. Works have appeared and featured in places such as Forbes, Huffington Post, ESPN and NBC Sports to name a few. Follow me on Twitter at @RobCobb_INSC, email me at robert.cobb@theinscribermag.com